Sunday, November 12, 2017

The Sparkleball Rainbowacy - Part 4 - The Mysterious IF, Crystal Meth in Egypt, and Death Takes Out the Trash


Welcome back to the Sparkleball Rainbowacy, where I am VIOLENTLY IGNORING THIS WISH. 


In the last episode, Zola died. Melancholy was torn up about it, but he still gets to talk to her ghost. 

Well, that's a depressing start. 


Well, okay. This is just going to be a depressing chapter, because Eggplant is dying.


Eggplant - Ease up on the armpits, skeleton fingers.



Eggplant - Mom? I'm almost there! Give me a boost, would ya?

I'm not crying, you're crying. T__T


Jenna - Yeah, can you send an emergency doggo over? 


So, we got our first doggo of the legacy! Here's hims as a pupperino. 


"What's wrong with this family?" 
I named him Febreeze. 


Crystal Meth - OW, Mom! Watch it! I think you need your wings oiled.
Winter - Hmm...good idea. Jenna??! ;D
CM - I hope your tax write-off's gonna pay for my therapy.


Then there was a brief sojourn to Egypt to give Jenna (me) a break from the insanity of controlling such a large household. 








I wonder how Crystal Meth got through Say No to Drugs week...
CM (offscreen) - I know I'm fucking sick of people asking me if I spiked the punch. 
I did. 
With laxative. 
D= careful now, I really don't want to play an apocalypse resulting from too many flushing toilets...


Can I not leave you to your own devices for five minutes?
Jenna - Feeling a bit well done. 
Don't get soot on the carpet. 


As it turns out, this is actually Winter and Jenna's birthday. Because I added days to their lifespan since their last kid grew to a teenager. 
LET THE OLDIFICATION COMMENCE


What? I didn't even invite half of you...


Winter - Wait, how did we jump 50 days up our lifespans? I literally just got rheumatoid arthritis this morning on the toilet! 
CM - Um...yeah. That's it. 
I take it the punch wasn't all she pumped with laxatives.



Jenna - Ew, my tits just sagged like deflated balloons.
Winter - Want me to--
NOPE. NO. NEXT PHOTO.


Winter glitched out while making a bowl of mac n cheese, so it stuck to her hand. 
Winter - What kind of NASA glue is this?


W - Oh, I look like a professor. A professor of getting pu--
GODDAMNIT WINTER, SHUT UP


W - Heeey, I'm old now. I can say whatever bullshit I want, thanks. Now go and get a nice boyfriend or girlfriend and spend your days fucking in a hammock. 
Wut.


Jenna - Why do I look like a librarian...
Blue Suede's torso - This is the lamest cameo ever. 


Kellan gets to know the new dog.
Kellan - why the fook are you named after fabric refresher? you're the size of a bloody guinea pig!
Febreeze - Says the pink shoebrush. 
Kellan - OOK, I'll hav ur head in!


Crystal Meth produced this LTW. 
Can't be that difficult. 


Zola's out to haunt. She picks her favorite napping place. 


One of the live cats caught an Ancient Dragon. So I got a cage and named him Spyro. 
Now, where the hell am I going to put 20 effing cages? D=


Got annoyed with Winter's Unstable want, so I restored her original wants with the Midlife Crisis LTR. Also, don't get used to the black UI. It had its downsides...like not being able to read half the pop-up menus. 



Kellan and Melancholy share some father and son daughter time. 


Febreeze grew up. 


And he got blue! 




Crystal Meth got a second prom.. 

WELL THEN. So much for being NICE. 


SO...it's time for Crystal Meth to become an adult. 

And the HEIR. 



So, she's a Computer Whiz, Snob, Loner, Heavy Sleeper, and...SHUT UP, I KNOW WHAT IT IS >:( 



GRUMPY. 
She's grumpy. 
CM - Surely, you couldn't have forgotten, moron.
You dare to insult me...ON THE DAY OF MY...Sunday. .__.


Kellan - Oi, I hate cats.
Melancholy - Um. Dad? I think you're losing it. 


I took Crystal Meth to Egypt. 
...don't get to say that sentence everyday. 
CM - UM. I'M ON FIRE?
Oh, shit, she might explode! 


Playing guitar with Crystal Meth at an Egyptian market. 
Man, this is a fucked up game of Clue...


Oh, this hall doesn't look ominous at all...


Who was the murderer?
Was it THE MUMMY, in the TOMB, with the CRYSTAL METH?



Back at home, I give Crystal Meth's bedroom an upgrade. A shower because the workbench likes to set sims on fire. 


Time to train this doggo to hunt! 
We have cages already bought for CM's LTW. 


I've been staring at this photo for five minutes trying to remember why I took it and then I realized there was a bird in this cage! Meet Tweety! 


Here's Franklin the turtle...


And Snek the danger rope. 
"I'm a sneeeeek...I ain't scare. I ain't scare of no thing." 


Kellan's getting old again...


Kellan - Pass me the walker. 
All my cats are getting old again...=(


Speaking of old...
Jenna - You may have your night creme, but I will lick it off, bb...
AND THAT'S ENOUGH OF THESE TWO. 


Crystal Meth graduated. Winter starved. 


Then I saw something strange...
Hesper, if I'm not mistaken, is Delphinium's IF. Who's away at the School of Peace and Love because I couldn't be fucked with caring for her. 
WTF??


Hesper - Be my friend...forever...
I NEED A YOUNG PRIEST AND OLD PRIEST


Azure makes an appearance. 
Azure - Who's brilliant idea was it to have danishes at a Donut's Anonymous meeting? 


As a hermit...I feel so attack right now...


Winter - I'll get rid of this bitch...
Jenna - No, Winter. Don't you dare get blood on that suit. 


Return to Egypt...playing guitar because this cashier bitch won't get me info on a relic. 
CM - I'm gonna play I'm Yours and sing it in a Mickey Mouse until you give me the details! 


OH. THIS. PHOTO. IS.
AMAZING. 
CM -  mY eyEBroWs iz FUckEd Up 


CM - Aw, come on! This is a vacation! You don't fix showers on vacation!


And we find a bird and pick her up.


QUIT PLAYING WITH THE BIRD AND GO DO STUFF

I'm sure that was funnier if you're British. 


If only this was true with dishes...




Melancholy got old. =(


Delphinium graduated.


Like it matters, but here's her LTW.



WHAT THE HELL

I DIDN'T HAVE ANYONE MAKE AN IF POTION

WHAT IS HAPPENING


Delphy is possibly the only sim that can pull off this hair.

And then she promptly moved out.


Crystal Meth doesn't like Eggplant's ghost.
Leave him alone, he just wants to sleep and think about butterflies.


Febreeze is in the pool. In the winter. 
F - Chill. I rubbed myself in Flame Fruit juice.


I built a basement for animal cages and a garden since the one above is dormant in the winter.
There's even a pool window!


POOL WINDOW


Is Jenna going to meet her LTW? 



Um. Kellan. 
You're looking a bit.
Buried.
Kellan - Aye, it's alright. I rubbed Flame Fruit juice on my arse.
Lamest running joke ever. 


Sooo...evidently ghost cats can use the washing station? What's a ghost cat doing to get dirty?
Zola - The clouds in Cat Heaven are made of catnip. Bad thing is, it gets matted in the fur. 


NOOOOOO

NOT SPYRO

He barely lasted 40 pictures. Ancient, indeed.


CM - SHOCKING NEWS
Crystal Meth still failing at traps.


These tombs give me Tomb Raider vibes. 
But Crystal Meth is no Lara Croft.
CM - HEY


So, since we moved to Moonlight Falls, we lost our gnomes. But now we have a dog gnome. 
I named it Vladimir Putin. 


I'm not going to lie, I'm going to cry like a baby when this two go.


GODDAMNIT

SNEK.

So courageous. 

I suck at keeping minor pets. 


Jenna got a promotion to level 8 in the Culinary career.


Eggplant - Hello. I am appropriately blue. 
How many frickin cat ghosts am I going to have by the end of this...



Jenna - I shall serenade the remaining animals with a Song of Life.



NOOOOOO

STOP DYING


Why've you gotta make me SADDDD T___T


So, since Melancholy's nearing the Rainbow Road, I figured I get her pregnant to continue the cat legacy.
Everyone meet Smurf!


Yes, Melancholy is an elder.
Yes, I used mods. 
But I'm not keeping score, so...KITTENS


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

JENNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

WHHHHHHYYYYY


Jenna - Uh. Death? I'm already dead. 
Death - Just making sure. Don't want any zombie fairies. 


Obviously, she wasn't at the house when she died. So I had a hell of time trying to find her urn.

Bye, Jenna. You were a great founder and had five children and too many cats. 

Her LTW wasn't fulfilled. 

I am sad.



And of course, everytime I try to get in this guy's house in which Jenna died, he's out doing something!

I NEED HER URN


ALSO. 

WHERE THE HELL ARE THEIR PICTURES.


Got it. 

Okay. I can breathe.

EDIT: Okay, you probably already know that I'm writing these in after the fact. So, Kellan did indeed die, but my stupid ass didn't get any pictures of it. So, Kellan also died. 

WHINE



Crystal Meth - All this death is making me drown in misery! 
SO much death in this chapter! 




Zola's back for a haunt. 


And she glitches out. Awesome. 


Winter - My love...T_T
Hold on, I need to accept my delivery of 50,000 boxes of tissues. 


Melancholy settles down to give birth...



WOAH. 

Did the brother fair better?


Nope. 

They're both boys. So I named them Grinch and Green Bean. Because the next gen's color shall be green.


So, I actually downloaded a poster mod that allowed me to load in my own pictures. So here's Jenna's portrait...


And the hall became the shrine of dead cats...
Morbid? Nah, just a legacy house.

KELLLAAAAAAAN

How could I forget to take pictures?! 


Haunting newspapers? Really?

Kellan: Fookin' bent, forgettin' bout me! 



Melancholy: Um. Guys?

NOOOOOOOOOO



Death is becoming a permanent fixture here. 


So long, Melancholy. Enjoy the catnip clouds. 


Then Death viewed Winter's pre-mortis portrait.
Death - Hmm...this incense is divine! Uh, I mean...dark. Like...darkness. And evil. 


He then took out the trash...


And hated our gnome. 
Wut. 

Anyway, this is all for this chapter...tune in next time for maybe some possible dating prospects and maybe a green makeover?



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